How to get out of avoidance mode?
Ilene Glover
2025-07-28 01:16:13
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: 15
I've tried the whole 9 yards. Therapy, healthy sleep schedule, exercise everyday, medication. I am caught in this cycle and cannot stop. I need instant gratification, and will seek out any short term pleasure to avoid my anxiety. Even though this eventually just causes more anxiety and problems.
Maymie Spencer
2025-07-15 08:23:00
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: 16
Approach, do not avoid, situations or activities that bring on social anxiety. Create a ladder from simple to hard activities that you can slowly engage in. With each step up the ladder, you will feel yourself getting stronger and braver. Practice Mindfulness of Emotions to allow yourself to fully experience your distress and accept that emotions can be painful but they will pass. Negative emotions do not last forever but by avoiding them, you only make them feel more painful. Talk back to your Inner Critic. Talk to yourself in a compassionate way by taking a non-judgmental stance. You can create a coping card or a brief audio recording to remind you to be compassionate to yourself. Have a Growth Mindset. In the learning zone, you focus on activities designed for improvement and concentrate on what you have not yet mastered and you do not expect to be perfect. Practice assertiveness skills. Being assertive means being able to stand up for your rights in a calm and positive way, without being either aggressive or overly passively. Your Healthy Adult takes responsibility for choices and actions, and makes and keeps commitments. In a balanced way, you pursue activities that are likely to be fulfilling in work, intimate and social relationships, sporting, cultural and service-related activities.
Hyman Runte
2025-07-15 07:06:16
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: 13
The first step to resolving avoidance coping is recognizing that you’re doing it — noticing the subtle and more obvious ways you’re pulling away from your feelings instead of making room for them. Once you’ve acknowledged you’re in a moment where you’d choose avoidance, you can actively take a small step toward — rather than away from — what’s making you uncomfortable. Do one thing every day that scares you just a little; something you’d usually avoid unless you had to. When that gets easy, see if you can push yourself just a little more. You don’t have to start with the largest conflict in your life. Take a breath, notice what you’re feeling, and think about what you will be proud of yourself for later. Exploring ways to solve challenges instead of trying to escape them can also help, such as writing down some ways that might change a difficult dynamic. It can be helpful just to have a series of steps written down so that you can re-center your thoughts when instinct tells you to avoid. If needed, seeking out a therapist who specializes in helping people overcome avoidance — a therapist specializing in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) will know how to help.
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